Since Monday Memories days are over, I decided to post something funny. Funny like Fridays use to be, but on a Monday. Just because Mondays really need to be Fridays.

You know, sometimes I kind of select what I want to hear. I think. Because I hear something completely different than what the persons afterwards CLAIMS to have said to me.

No wonder that my world is so nice and positive…!

So today I’ll serve you a little positive story.

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult, four hour, surgical procedure.

A young, student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.

“Nurse”, he mumbles, from behind the mask.
“Are my testicles black?”

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir, I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

He struggles to ask again,
“Nurse, are my testicles black?”

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his “joystick” in one hand, and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around. Then, she takes a close look and says, “There’s nothing wrong with them, Sir.”

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but, listen very, very closely…..


“A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k?”

10 Comments on “Selective hearing is positive”

    Maribeth UNITED STATES said:

    I am laughing so hard I fear I have woken my husband from sleep! (I’m always up early with the dogs) I’ve got to read this to him!

    Lifecruiser: I’m very happy to hear that! Always enjoy a good laugh :-)

    Sandy UNITED STATES said:

    Yeap I have read that one before…funny :-) My monday memory is up anyway!! I love Monday Memories. You don’t do them anymore? They are my favorite part of the memes that are done in blogging. It makes me think of all the fun times that I had as a child. Go read mine if you…Sandy

    Lifecruiser: It’s because the monday meories is not maintained by any one any longer.

    Read Debbies post about the ending of Monday Memories.

    Wystful 1 UNITED STATES said:

    Oh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy cow. Now, ya know…I was kinda expectin’ this somehow, but still shock. rofl And of course being raised in the gutter as I was…

    Well, never mind! You really don’t wanna know.
    *skipping away - whistling a happy tune*

    Lifecruiser: Oh, so this post made you whistle hah? *lol*

    Gregg R UNITED STATES said:



    Definitely made me laught too. Come on over and see my mom. (yeah, I know, misery is having a beautiful mother and everyone tells you, you look like your father.)

    Lifecruiser: That sounds about the same as I had to listen to earlier: I have my fathers body… at least legs????!!! *LMAO*

    Norma UNITED STATES said:

    Do you mean no more Monday Memories? Will I have to unlink you?

    My MM is up.

    Lifecruiser: Since Debbie is no longer hosting Monday Memories - and no one volunteered to take over the work with the blogroll, I’ve decided to quit doing them too. It was too few that participated every week.

    Her post about the ending

    I’ll pop by your blog anyway :-)

    amy UNITED STATES said:

    I always love hearing that!!! thanks…hubby will like that as well

    Lifecruiser: Good :-)

    mar SPAIN said:

    I had heard this one before but had forgotten the punch line ( call it weak memory, lol). It’s a great joke!

    Lifecruiser: Yes, it sure is :-) Memory, what’s that? *lol*


    Ha,ha,ha..I want to go to that hospital..

    Lifecruiser: Well, maybe we can send you there, where do you want to get damaged…? *lol*

    Debbie UNITED STATES said:

    LOL I have heard this one before but it always is funny to hear again!

    Lifecruiser: Yes, I too can hear jokes more than once, at least it will make me smile :-)

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